[It doesn't make him feel any better, knowing Yasusada couldn't have used it on himself, because all he's thinking of right now is how much weight and responsibility his mirroring sword carries when he's able to split so very little - practically none - of it with him. They can already do so little here, and it feels like he can do less and less, even if he knows that isn't the case.
But, again... it's not like he doesn't understand what this is. Where it comes from. If their positions were reversed, he would do everything the same, step-for-step. In fact, he'd probably be crueler than Yasusada in many ways, because even between the two of them, he hides more.
That single, simple statement just seals it, slicing through him like a blade, hurting and warming him in equal parts. He closes his eyes, taking a quiet breath in.]
I need you here too, Yasusada. [Soft, so very, very soft.] ...So don't forget our promise.
[Even though he knows they have so little control. Even though he knows that if their promise is broken, it would be of no fault of either of them. Even though he would still forgive Yasusada, though there'd be nothing to forgive, and he'd still hold that little piece of bitterness within him.
The feeling is one of sorrow and love, with the same reflected fear: I don't want to be alone.]
[He doesn't want to let go of Kashuu's hand, but he has to. He has to, because he can't not lift his arms to wrap them around Kashuu and pull him into a tight hug.
They are mirrors in all the worst ways, sometimes, but maybe this one is for the best--in the moments where they are so perfectly in sync that they don't need anything--not magic, not even words--to understand each other.]
He really does hold onto Yasusada sometimes in the same way someone might tightly hold onto themselves, in moments of loneliness or panic or terror. Yasusada is grounding and familiar - someone he knows like the back of his hand. Ever-present, always reliable. Holding him tightly, as if in spite toward the space that ever exists between them, is something that always feels natural.
He doesn't say anything in response. He knows he doesn't have to, in the same way that technically, none of what they've said needed to be said. That intrinsic understanding shines through.
It'll be a cold day in hell when this place tears Yasusada from his hands without him being close behind.]
no subject
But, again... it's not like he doesn't understand what this is. Where it comes from. If their positions were reversed, he would do everything the same, step-for-step. In fact, he'd probably be crueler than Yasusada in many ways, because even between the two of them, he hides more.
That single, simple statement just seals it, slicing through him like a blade, hurting and warming him in equal parts. He closes his eyes, taking a quiet breath in.]
I need you here too, Yasusada. [Soft, so very, very soft.] ...So don't forget our promise.
[Even though he knows they have so little control. Even though he knows that if their promise is broken, it would be of no fault of either of them. Even though he would still forgive Yasusada, though there'd be nothing to forgive, and he'd still hold that little piece of bitterness within him.
The feeling is one of sorrow and love, with the same reflected fear: I don't want to be alone.]
no subject
They are mirrors in all the worst ways, sometimes, but maybe this one is for the best--in the moments where they are so perfectly in sync that they don't need anything--not magic, not even words--to understand each other.]
I know. I won't.
no subject
He really does hold onto Yasusada sometimes in the same way someone might tightly hold onto themselves, in moments of loneliness or panic or terror. Yasusada is grounding and familiar - someone he knows like the back of his hand. Ever-present, always reliable. Holding him tightly, as if in spite toward the space that ever exists between them, is something that always feels natural.
He doesn't say anything in response. He knows he doesn't have to, in the same way that technically, none of what they've said needed to be said. That intrinsic understanding shines through.
It'll be a cold day in hell when this place tears Yasusada from his hands without him being close behind.]